Welcome!

Hello everybody(Simpson's character voice),

Since many of you had suggested I do this over the years, I decided now would be a good time. Since my life has recently entered a new chapter which I'm aptly calling the SF Times, starting a blog to chronicle all the ins and outs of this humpalicious life of mine might be a fun and theraputic way for me to express myself. With that said, I'll start my first post with the recent events that took place today...

Part of my job, is strategically setting up and marketing new releases. Simple enough. However, I've found with this job, that the credibility of an artist is hardly relevant in the A&R process. Often I end up with mediocre talent that expect us to do 95% of the work for them, while they sit back and assume the money will start rolling in any second. Part of being an artist is having that egocentric attitude that made people like Madonna an icon. But honestly, Madonna might be the least musically talented person on the planet. Her tenacity and intelligence is what made her the super star she's been for over the last 25 years. I'm a firm believer that if you have the talent, you can in fact make music your sole provider. But, having the talent only accounts for half the battle.

Today I sat at lunch with one of the most out of touch individuals. He's definitely pushing 50, considers himself a cross between Marc Anthony and Josh Groban and dropped his jaw when my co-worker and I explained that he would in fact have to do marketing and publicity on his side as well as ours. He couldn't believe I would suggest he tour. He bawlked at the idea of having to leave Las Vegas (his current hometown) in order to reach the masses. He claims having over 18k "friends" on Myspace should be enough. He's never ever released an album before but has over 30 songs he's recorded. Some of which he's "written" himself. My favorite is "Somewhere" from West Side Story translated into Hebrew. Yes, he's a Jewban (Cuban Jew) so he's brought it upon himself to re-translate every modern ballad to date, into a different language. Richard Marx's "Right Here Waiting" even gets a makeover with his Portugeuse version. How these people are allowing him to butcher their songs, let alone in a different language, is not my problem. What is my problem, is the problem I've been having recently in my career. Everyone thinks they're a super star. Everyone thinks because their mommy told them they could carry a tune that at some point in their life, they were destined to get a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. My issue is the DEMAND and THREAT these artists throw at me. I can't MAKE people buy your music buddy. I can't imagine 18 year old boys in dorms across the country jamming to this - (took website down to keep names anonymous)

After our argumentative lunch which left me with more indigestion that I expected to have from a salmon quiche, this guy took out his camcorder and asked me to sit down and do a brief interview a la Actor's Studio. Somehow I came out looking smarter than I usually do and he seemed please, but I have the sinking suspicion that this project with be the death of me.

Back to the oasis...